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My Name is Romina

I came out as transgender today.
This was the first time
I said any of what I was
Experiencing out loud:

"My name is Romina,
but I only just realized it.
I am a woman. I have always been.
Now that I have words for my feelings,
I don't know where to begin.

"I feel destined for war,
doomed to struggle eternally.
I want peace and happiness.
I want things to be okay.
Why must I always fight?

"Instead, I get terror.
Gnawing fear.
Paralyzing anxiety.
Immeasurable sadness.
Loneliness. Exclusion.

"I have been a shadow, a ghost;
I wish I would have known,
I wish I could have known
Sooner. I could have saved myself
From the crushing distance.

"Courage is acting in spite of fear,
Not being insensitive to it.
I am a strong woman,
I am loved and supported;
I can do this."